Answer a few questions and we'll tell you the optimal way to feed addictive stimulants into your bloodstream until your heart races
Your Coffee Destiny (No Pressure)
You are visitor number:
5318808
(Flip your computer screen upside down to reveal the secret message)
By using this quiz, you agree that your coffee preferences will be stored in our massive data lake, analyzed by our AI, and used to send you targeted ads for overpriced coffee gadgets until the end of time. Your future purchasing decisions have been predetermined. Resistance is futile.
AFFILIATE DISCLAIMER: (Necessary Legal Mumbo Jumbo) Some links on this page are affiliate links. If you click on them and make a purchase, we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Probably. We only recommend products we believe will enhance your caffeine dependency or that we otherwise found randomly online. Possible affiliate income has no bearing on our top secret algorithm.
